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YOUR RESEARCHOde to the M96: ?50 Ways to Lose Your Motor?
Reported or suspected cause
american / polish background thingy
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Reported cause
part of it was the American / Polish background thingy.....
Leading evidence: 'american / polish background thingy' (1 discussions report identifying this cause; no attributable repair resolution). Across 1 matching discussions, the most frequently mentioned possible cause is 'american / polish background thingy' (1 discussions; 1 report identifying it and 0 suggest it). The most frequently discussed action is 'Repair pains' (1 discussions). For that action, 0 discussions report a resolution and 0 report an unsuccessful attempt. No action has an explicit, attributable resolution report under the current rules. These are forum reports and suggestions, not a confirmed diagnosis.
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Suggestion · Original poster
and wished there was something that he could do to diminish repair pains
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Suggestion
Talent really does run wide and deep in this group.
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44 eligible posts · 0 unverified posts · 1 discussions match the subject in their title or opening post.
Rennlist: 1 discussions
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Generation: 20261027T005001Z · outcome-qualification-6. Deterministic extraction; no AI model inference. How we use sources
While reading, "6 Ways to Keep Your M96 Engine Going Strong", I thought about Paul Simon's song - "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover". As I listened to that song on Spotify, I couldn't help but substitute some of our M96 common issues into that song. Ok ok ok... I admit it, it's cheesy... just got bored at lunch today and started typing.
Enjoy...
Ode to the M96
“50 Ways to Lose Your Motor”
[Verse 1:]
“The fears are all inside my head” Gnat said to me,
The matter can be explained if you…
take it logically!
“Jake might help ‘reconstruct’ her but it
won’t be free.”
There must be fifty ways to lose your motor
5CHN3LL said it's “not my style
to intrude” (coughs)
“Furthermore, I hope my words won't be ignored or misconstrued,
but I'll grade your compositions with a deadly mix of sarcasm and shrew”
There must be fifty ways to lose your motor
Fifty ways to lose your motor
[CHORUS:]
Smoke out the back, Jack
Metal in the pan, Stan
It’s not a cheap lil’ toy, Roy
It will bring ya to your knees.
Gonna need to take a bus, Gus
It will make you cuss much
Never lose your key, Lee
Or a major tow fee!
[2nd CHORUS:]
Oil startin’ to drip, Chip
Lifters makin’ a tick, Rick
Water pump in the sump, Chump
Just listen to me!
Got a crack in your head, Fred
All plugs are dead, Ed!
‘Intermix’ is like blood in the pee, Bree
Milkshakes are never free.
[Verse 2:]
Cuda said knows all too well about the dreads of bad chains,
and wished there was something that he could do to diminish repair pains
I said I appreciate that
And would Macster please explain
About the fifty ways…
I thought I just sleep on it tonight
And maybe in the morning, if I’m lucky, I’ll read another Sneaky/Martin Fight
But then it hit me…
And I realized Gonzo was right
There must be fifty ways to lose your motor
Fifty ways to lose your motor
Repeat chorus
You should get Jake to do the voice over ? Marty on percussion?
If this gets out to the general car-buying public ,the M96 values will plummet.
It should be removed immediately.
Just kidding.
Absolutely brilliant entertainment.
How does it sound with a B3 Hammond accompaniment ?
Then you could post it on You Tube !
hahaha... naw... The B3 is a screamin' rock instrument... it would take away from the subtle humor of the song.
But you have an awesome idea...
Imagine Jake singing lead and playing guitar (like Paul Simon) and Martin on drums in the background. hahaha
Everybody else on 996 Rennlist (as a choir) comes in on the chorus. hahahahahaha!!!!!
I think I just spew'd my drink!
Thanks!
hahaha! I think I know what you're talking about here...
You mean it's based on Simon and Garfunkel's song, "The Boxer"?
You think the part of the chorus where it goes, "Lie la lie, Lie la la la lie lie lie" fits the Rennlist Boxster crowd?
Thank you, thank you very much for this award. I would like to begin by thanking all of those little people ... uhhhh... where are they... Anybody got some reading glasses??
hahahaha!
This one goes out to our unfortunate Rennlist friend who shifted into first at 100 mph. To the tune of AC/DC's Thunderstruck:
(Blunder! Ah ah ah ah ahhh ah,)
Blunder!
I was caught
In the middle of an autocross track (blunder!)
I shifted down
And I knew there was no turning back (blunder!)
My mind raced
And I thought, oh what the hell? (blunder!)
And I knew
There was no help, no help from Schnell (blunder!)
Sound of the revs
Was like a giant fart
The thunder of rods
Tore my motor apart
It's been...
BLOWN TO ***K!
Play the vid and sing along!!
Verse 1:
"Raby... Raby..... Raby... he don't believe me
Ooh, geez he don't believe me... that we need his help
I have got this squirmin', burnin', IMS not turnin' feelin' inside me
Ooh... deep inside my car..... and it sounds so bad"
Verse 2:
"You came and designed a new part, now (Raby, Raby)..... so cleverly...
The one Porsche should have thought of (Raby, Raby)
That seems to work correctly (Raby, Raby)
Ooh but now that I surrender all of my cash (Raby, Raby)... so helplessly
You now want to leave (Raby, Raby)
Ooh, you wanna close your hotline (Raby, Raby)
Ooh... Raby... Raby... Where do our calls go? Oooh don't I wonder...
I guess to Charles Navarro (Raby, Raby)."
A W E S O M E guys!!! This is turning into an EPIC thread. hahaha
I'm in stitches! Cuda - I give you kudos (or should I say "Cudas") my friend on the song... love the "Raby raby" part! hahaha
Sneaky - I guess I'm the weird one here cause I always enjoyed reading your entanglements with Martin. hehehe.
Yes, it was definitely similar.
Regrettably, mullets and male pattern baldness don't coexist in nature...so the mullet and I went our separate ways. I left 80's music entirely, and the mullet started working on a solo career that never really went anywhere. Last I heard, it was cited for loitering around the showers at the Flying J truck stop in Barstow.
I'll have a go.
ready for slings and arrows:
Floyd, Comfortably Numb
Hello, hello-hello
are there any bearings in there?
Nod if you can hear things,,
Anything at alllllllll.
C'mon c'mon-down,
I can see you kneeling - down,
I can see the stain
Oil spread over the ground
Relax, relax-relax,
Jake has info that really hurts,
Just the basic facts,
he can show you piston skirts
There's no valve train - you are deceiving
A missed speed-shift - smoke on the horizon
You are only grinding off cam chains.....
Your wrist moves, but see the black flag waves....
When I was at 8 grand I had some lifters
my rods look just like six spitoons
now I feel like screaming once again - I can't explain you would not understand - the smoke tells me to google L and N
Myyyyyyyyyyy-yyyyy shaft has become,
chunks in the sump.
In another forum we had a thread with only limericks about the subject matter. Some were pretty colorful.
'A bigwig in a blue Panamera
sold his new pig and bought a Carerra
.......'
You get the idea.
